04 May 2009
It's 10pm and I should be in bed. If I had my hubby to cuddle with and a little boy asleep in HIS OWN room, I'd probably be there now, counting some sheep. But tonight I'm here in Virginia visiting my folks while Tim is away on business. Oscar is asleep in the guest room where I will soon join him, or at least try to without waking him, and where I will wake up every time he stirs. For some reason, when Tim is away, I feel such an intense burden of responsibility. It is so intense that I literally lose sleep and never quite feel comfortable. It's not so much during the day hours, just primarily during the evening hours. I have the HARDEST time making decisions about Oscar's night time routine and I sometimes just sit there and stare blankly. It's like things just aren't quite right. You know the feeling? It's like you are wearing shoes on the wrong feet - they are the right size and everything and you're able to put them on but they are just twisted enough to annoy your toes. I am really thankful to my folks for letting me crash their place though. I needed to be in a different setting to keep me from hibernating. Seriously, if it was up to me, I'd eat Special K cereal for every meal and lounge about in my yoga pants all day. (Of course I'd dress and bathe the kiddo and feed him properly and all that...) This post is making me sound pathetic. I'm not pathetic - just lazy and unmotivated, I guess? I don't know, but I'm really hoping for some sunshine tomorrow. I think a good dose of vitamin D would do me a world of good. We'll see. I guess I'll go try to count some sheep now.
Posted by suzy bomgardner at 9:10 PM